Graduation, Birthdays, Jail, Summer & NPD
The end of the school year finally rolled around. Longest semester of my life. She couldn't go to school where her mother was working so we found an alternative for her. Our school system offered a neat program for kids who struggled with the big classes for whatever reason. The teachers were amazing and it truly was a blessing. Between the panic attacks and seizures and her shoulder dislocating, I was ready to just sit by the pool and do nothing. We were tired. We were all tired. Bring on summer!
We celebrated our daughters college graduation. It was an awesome day for our family! I remember saying to my husband that day while we watched her get her diploma, "We did it! We got one raised!" We were so excited and so proud. My parents were here and my husband's father was here too. Our sweet friend stayed at home with her as we didn't want to take away from our daughter's big day. She was still suffering from passing out due to panic attacks. She started having trouble with her other shoulder a few weeks prior. It dislocated that day and our friend had to take her to the ER. Told you there lots of visits to the ER. The doctor told us to follow up with the orthopedic surgeon. Great....
During this month, her brother had a birthday and she turned 16. I knew it would be difficult. It was. She desperately worried about her younger brother. We bought a small cake to celebrate his birthday. Between his birthday and her birthday, her mother was arrested for domestic violence. Finally she was strong enough to do what needed to be done. Imagine being 16 and pressing charges on your mother for abuse. Horrible but she did it. She had broken the cycle in the family. I called her Esther...She rolled her eyes but she was courageous. Her story has never once veered. Not one time. Trust me when I say this, no 16 year would have wanted to be in her shoes. She would say, "I just want to do what everyone is doing but here I am pressing charges on my mom who is an abuser." And, then, I'd say Esther.. And again, I'd get the eye roll. I told her that she would see some day how strong and amazing she was at this age. She will empower others to do the same thing. To speak up.
Life was ok. We were busy with wedding showers and enjoying friends and family. We took our annual family beach trip. I remember it being a little crazy but we survived. Her shoulder dislocated again, another trip to the ER was made. We really needed to see the surgeon. Once we were home one of my friends introduced me to one of her friends. We had joined a pool that summer because I figured it would be good for the kids to have some place to go. Since I wasn't working after leaving the office, I had time to reflect on the past several months. I often listen to a Christian radio station and I would think, gosh, I'd love to tell how God has worked in our lives. Even though it's been hard He's been here and He's opened doors and provided for us. One of my friends who is a member at the same pool introduced me to one of her friends. When she said her name, I squealed! Her husband works at the radio station. I said, oh I have a good story! God has shown up big. We chatted for a while and exchanged numbers. She recommended a book for me to read regarding the narcissistic mother. . You're Not Crazy It's Your Mother. by Danu Morrigan. I went home and downloaded it to my kindle. I couldn't stop reading it. It literally changed my whole perspective on the family we were dealing with. I kept thinking, this fits them to a tee. I learned when a child whether it's an adult child or an adolescent child exposes the narcissist they will be tossed. And, I learned that when that happens and they've made the narcissist look bad, the narcissist will then deflect and make themselves look like the victim. When I was reading this, I kept thinking, wow, just wow! Reading the book, gave me some closure with this family. I realized we were not dealing with a normal family. I mean, I knew that before but this confirmed it on a whole new level. I had never in my life met people like this and this explained a lot. They were never going reach out to her. They were done. She blew the whistle and now she had to be dead to them. I've learned so much about Narcissistic Personality Disorder in the past year. It is a very scary type of person. Once I finished the book, I told her that her mother most likely has NPD and she was ill. She said, I lived with her for 15 years, I tried I tried to make her love me and I was never enough. Yep. She could be the daughter in the book. So very very sad. But, now I knew what to expect and watching her mother's behavior from a far and through what people told me it all made sense. Thank you God for bringing new friends in my life! God knew I needed to know this is mother I was dealing with. Reading that book helped me so much. I still lean on it today. It doesn't make what they've done ok, but it helps me see why they've done what they've done. Maybe just a little bit of peace.
A narcissist paints a picture of
themselves as being the victim or
innocent in all aspects. They will
be offended by the truth. But what
is done in the dark will come to light.
Time has a way of showing people's
true colors........Unless you live it, it's impossible to
they will control how others see you.
We celebrated our daughters college graduation. It was an awesome day for our family! I remember saying to my husband that day while we watched her get her diploma, "We did it! We got one raised!" We were so excited and so proud. My parents were here and my husband's father was here too. Our sweet friend stayed at home with her as we didn't want to take away from our daughter's big day. She was still suffering from passing out due to panic attacks. She started having trouble with her other shoulder a few weeks prior. It dislocated that day and our friend had to take her to the ER. Told you there lots of visits to the ER. The doctor told us to follow up with the orthopedic surgeon. Great....
During this month, her brother had a birthday and she turned 16. I knew it would be difficult. It was. She desperately worried about her younger brother. We bought a small cake to celebrate his birthday. Between his birthday and her birthday, her mother was arrested for domestic violence. Finally she was strong enough to do what needed to be done. Imagine being 16 and pressing charges on your mother for abuse. Horrible but she did it. She had broken the cycle in the family. I called her Esther...She rolled her eyes but she was courageous. Her story has never once veered. Not one time. Trust me when I say this, no 16 year would have wanted to be in her shoes. She would say, "I just want to do what everyone is doing but here I am pressing charges on my mom who is an abuser." And, then, I'd say Esther.. And again, I'd get the eye roll. I told her that she would see some day how strong and amazing she was at this age. She will empower others to do the same thing. To speak up.
Life was ok. We were busy with wedding showers and enjoying friends and family. We took our annual family beach trip. I remember it being a little crazy but we survived. Her shoulder dislocated again, another trip to the ER was made. We really needed to see the surgeon. Once we were home one of my friends introduced me to one of her friends. We had joined a pool that summer because I figured it would be good for the kids to have some place to go. Since I wasn't working after leaving the office, I had time to reflect on the past several months. I often listen to a Christian radio station and I would think, gosh, I'd love to tell how God has worked in our lives. Even though it's been hard He's been here and He's opened doors and provided for us. One of my friends who is a member at the same pool introduced me to one of her friends. When she said her name, I squealed! Her husband works at the radio station. I said, oh I have a good story! God has shown up big. We chatted for a while and exchanged numbers. She recommended a book for me to read regarding the narcissistic mother. . You're Not Crazy It's Your Mother. by Danu Morrigan. I went home and downloaded it to my kindle. I couldn't stop reading it. It literally changed my whole perspective on the family we were dealing with. I kept thinking, this fits them to a tee. I learned when a child whether it's an adult child or an adolescent child exposes the narcissist they will be tossed. And, I learned that when that happens and they've made the narcissist look bad, the narcissist will then deflect and make themselves look like the victim. When I was reading this, I kept thinking, wow, just wow! Reading the book, gave me some closure with this family. I realized we were not dealing with a normal family. I mean, I knew that before but this confirmed it on a whole new level. I had never in my life met people like this and this explained a lot. They were never going reach out to her. They were done. She blew the whistle and now she had to be dead to them. I've learned so much about Narcissistic Personality Disorder in the past year. It is a very scary type of person. Once I finished the book, I told her that her mother most likely has NPD and she was ill. She said, I lived with her for 15 years, I tried I tried to make her love me and I was never enough. Yep. She could be the daughter in the book. So very very sad. But, now I knew what to expect and watching her mother's behavior from a far and through what people told me it all made sense. Thank you God for bringing new friends in my life! God knew I needed to know this is mother I was dealing with. Reading that book helped me so much. I still lean on it today. It doesn't make what they've done ok, but it helps me see why they've done what they've done. Maybe just a little bit of peace.
A narcissist paints a picture of
themselves as being the victim or
innocent in all aspects. They will
be offended by the truth. But what
is done in the dark will come to light.
Time has a way of showing people's
true colors........Unless you live it, it's impossible to
see for most. The abuse is never done in front
of anyone that can see it for what it is.
It goes to show they will know full
well what they are doing
because they hide it.
E.Shew
If the narcissist's supporters know
that the narcissist was abusive toward you
and they still remain friends with the narcissist, they're TOXIC.
Plain and simple.
narcabuse.com
A narcissistic parent often plays favorites
with their kids and favors the one who they can
vicariously live through and makes
them "look good"
Shannon Thomas
Narcs put on a good show to the outside world.
Especially on social media.
not your average Joe after the sociopath
Narcissists are very vindictive. If they believe you've crossed them, you become enemy # 1. There is no level they won't stoop to, in an effort to make you pay for what you've done to them. The amount of intense hatred for you is everlasting.
narcissistic parent answers Facebook page.
When a narcissist can no longer control you, they will control how others see you.
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